In this universe of truth and lie, only two emotions are known to exist. Fear and Love.
What do you choose?
“Love is what we are born with
Fear is what we learn.”
I watched my seven-year-old cousin running on a damp, green field- swift, carefree and unafraid. When she asked me to join in, I couldn’t keep myself from worrying about wet mud and prickly thorns. No matter how fast I ran I had a hold on my feet which she did not. She just ran- like a wildfire.
The older we get, the more glorified fear becomes. We become aware of the unfathomable consequences and spin our decisions around ”what if”.
In those moments of haze, Tumblr screams, “But darling, what if you fly?”
But our fear holds us so tight that we refuse to give in.
When I look back to my life, I realize my worst regrets lie chained to my fears.
I was so scared, so afraid that I just ran away or better still, fell right in the pit.
This is not to say that we should be absolutely fearless. Elizabeth Gilbert profoundly explained in her book “Big Magic” what bonkers we would be if we were to believe that. There is a reason why fear-and-flight has been fixated in our body systems.
However, the fear shouldn’t ever be given the driving seat.
Have you watched Frozen? Categorizing it as a children’s movie should be a faux pas. Elsa’s character was every human figure on this planet. All the time she tried to conceal her magical potential, she was captured by the wrath of fear and all that could yield into was destruction. But when she let go of her fears, she created an enchanted world like no other. Love thaws!
When it comes to Love, we know one thing- it’s not easy.
We are scared to show too much love, too much care. “What if they don’t reciprocate?” “What if they think of me as a fool?”
So we conceal it, hide it and pretend it doesn’t exist. I have done that. I am a very afraid person. Or maybe I was. Because if I could change something, I would choose to be unafraid.
The more I tried to conceal it, the more sarcastic, cynical and angry I became. Concealing it was neither easy nor a very pleasant emotion. It was a soothing balm to my ego, but a burn to my heart of love.
Imagine, you have a heart full of love but you are SO AFRAID that you show them a heart full of ignorance. Did it make me feel strong? No, it didn’t. It made me feel like a loser eventually.
What stopped me? My fear.
A conversation with a friend made me re-enforce the idea of fear. We talked about our choices in our lives when it dawned on me what fear could do to different people.
When I chose writing, I was scared to death.
I doubted myself million times. But I knew this is what gives me a gratification like no other. And if I am afraid of anything, it’s to lose this dream forever. THIS FEAR made me make the right choice.
Whereas many other times, a lot of us use this fear as a persuader to sway us against the tide. We blame it, call it names and form it as an excuse to make a wrong choice- a choice which derails us from our dreams.
In fact, fear just not keeps you away from doing something extraordinarily beautiful but sometimes make you do horrifying things.
When you are afraid, you are jealous, anxious, scared and you desperately try to hurt- or worse, hurt yourself. No wonder, the prime focus of terrorism is to propagate fear. They themselves have been so consumed by fear and vengeance that they know the only thing which can burn out the world is fear itself.
Fear is that bitter-sweet friend which is hated yet remains indispensable and treasured.
You can’t be fearless- that’s not even an option.
As Gilbert wrote, you got to allow it to be a part of your journey. Allow it to sit back, offer some lemonade, relax. But be careful to not give any controls. It shouldn’t be allowed to direct you ways, make you sit safe or hold you back when you want to jump in the waters -unless of course you really don’t know how to swim, which is why you don’t have to be fearless!
You just have to be brave and courageous!